Reflections

Reflections from Clients Over the Years (2006–2025).

Unfortunately, original dates are unavailable after website migration.

Better late than never

I've been meaning to post a review on here for ages but after encountering something really difficult in my life recently, I realised that there was no way I would have coped with this if it wasn't for having psychotherapy with you a year or so ago. My relationship with myself has changed so much for the better, as have my relationships with other people. It was a challenging time and you were very honest with me, yet remained compassionate as well. Thank you for this Thom and I wish you well.

This has been a long, interesting and difficult journey. I didn't expect that my problems would/could be solved in a short period of time and they haven't been. I wouldn't change a second of it though. Thom has been genuine, reliable, honest and manages to blend integrity, challenge and authenticity with the best sense of humour (who knew that therapy could be fun sometimes?)

I can't add to anything else that anyone else has said here, other than another thank you. My life feels richer for having had you in it.

I've had 10 sessions of CBT for panic attacks and anxiety. I have gained so much from our sessions and I have learned new skills that will help me in the future also.

Throughout you have been supportive, caring and understanding Thom. Thank you very much.

Anon

Thom, thanks so much for lending a listening ear, offering advice, showing your kindness and giving re-assurance that when life gets tough, as often it does, there are ways to cope and get through it and that your door will always be open in the future should I ever need your help again. You made it feel ok in some way to show my feelings, to laugh and to cry. Your words of me needing to be kinder to myself will stay with me forever.

Lou

Want to thank you so much Thom for your help, I feel I am actually me again, will always be grateful to you. It was like talking to a old friend. Would recommend Thom 110%

THOM HELPED ME SO SO MUCH ... FIRSTLY I CAME 2 HIM ON THE BREAK DOWN OF MY MARRAGE WHICH HAS BIN ON AND OFF 4 3 YEARS , BUT AS THE WEEKS PROGRESSED WE TOUCHED ON OTHER SUBJECTS .. CANT THANK HIM ENOUGH .. HIGHLY HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

MANY THANKS

Apart from your qualifications and your obvious knowledge of your profession, you have some very, very special skills that you put to good use in your role as a therapist and as a person. There are no pretences about you and you are very human. By being just who you are, you enabled me to be just who I am. Something I had never really done much of and something that I now hold very dear.

Thank you,

Thom creates a comfortable, welcoming, safe and trusting environment. His qualities of listening and perception allowed me to feel a true sense of empathy from another. Sometimes I found it very difficult to articulate my feelings; Thom would not put 'words into my mouth' nor offer solutions or answers - this is something that you work out for yourself. Thom provided the platform to enable this to happen and helped me to gain a deeper insight into why I feel the way I feel. Grateful thanks.

I've come to the end of my counselling and I can't tell you how much I have benefited from my sessions. I expected a magic wand which of course it isn't, but I have learnt a lot about myself and with that learnt better ways of dealing with my problems.

I felt so lonely when I came to see you. I thought I was the only person in the world feeling like this and with my problem. You made it easy for me to talk to you and you didn't judge me.

Thank you so much.

I wanted to write this feedback to encourage anyone who is having doubts about making the first contact with Thom to take that first initial step.....I know I read the feedback page in great length before contacting him as I was not really sure ‘what went on’ in therapy...

I never thought I “qualified” for therapy as I would not say I had one big issue, just lots of small things & events such as relationship breakdowns & childhood issues that had mounted up over the years into what I can only describe as an impossible knotted almost football sized lump inside me that I was incapable of breaking down. I just had to carry it around and this imaginary growth was getting bigger and bigger and weighing me down. It stopped my mind from thinking in a rational manner and everyday life was just becoming more and more difficult. I was worried my composure mask was going to slip at work or in my social circle and that everyone would then know I had mental health issues and I would be labelled as the ‘unstable one’ (that’s how I felt inside).

21 months ago I knocked on Thom’s door after the suicide of a friend which was for me the final straw that led me to seek professional help – for years I had battled on and off with a rollercoaster like depression - some ups, but more downs, trying to hide and control it with medication and self help books but this was the tipping point for me. Something that I felt was about to tip me over the edge and that I could not deal with alone and by myself.

I always thought therapy was for people with ‘real’ deep rooted issues such as abuse and I almost felt I should not be ‘wasting’ Thom’s time with what I thought must appear as trivial issues to a trained professional. How wrong I was! Although I felt very vulnerable and exposed to begin with I felt at instant ease with Thom. He has a very natural way about him and for me the most important factor was that he does not have a white coat persona, he is just himself.

A very down to earth, gentle, kind and deeply caring individual who has an immense passion about his job combined with being the ultimate professional.

He was to begin with a total stranger who I had to learn to trust before I began to pour my heart and soul out to. Some of the stuff that came from inside me surprised me to the core, I had no idea that I had so much stored up inside me and Thom helped me to keep on challenging myself in my own time and at my own speed to keep pouring out all that I had felt was trapped deep inside.

Some weeks we would have a very intense and emotional session and I would leave with tear stained eyes feeling emotionally and mentally drained. Other weeks he would just know that I was fragile and not in the right state of mind to look any deeper and just deal with what was on the surface.

Not all the sessions are deep and dark, many weeks we would share a good giggle and he does have a wicked sense of humour!

He never made judgement, he just listened supported and encouraged me. Those first few months were hard, but something deep within motivated me to return, week after week. I wanted to find out about myself, what had made me as I was, and to look at where I might be going wrong and how I could make things better.

We talked about every aspect of my life and he listened carefully, asking pertinent questions that usually gave me the answers I needed in my own replies.

He has helped me to rationalise thought processes, to step outside of the thinking box and he has introduced me to boundaries, which I have been able to understand and implement in my life and this has made profound changes.

Almost 2 years on I am a much more confident and self assured person who has regained my sparkle and lust for life. Many friends have commented on the amazing change.

Thom...my heartfelt thanks for everything you have helped me achieve, your belief in me, your encouragement and your dedication to help me succeed. This week we have started to talk about endings. In one way it is going to feel a great loss of a strong built bond but on the flip side it makes me feel proud that I am now armed with the knowledge to be able to cope with life’s up’s and down’s on my own.

We have use many analogies in our sessions and all I can say is l have felt like a butterfly with a badly broken wing after trying to force myself back into my cocoon. You have helped me out of this deep dark space, to mend my wing and take flight again! Soaring higher than ever before!

I travelled a long way to see you for our sessions and I don't regret one mile of it. You 'got me' from day one and even when you didn't, you told me and didn't just nod your head like so many people do.

I've gone from strength to strength as a result of my therapy and I can not find words adequate enough to thank you.

I was so sad to say goodbye!

I didn't imagine that within such a short space of time as 6 weeks that I would feel so much better. I feel as though I've opened a door and although my therapy has ended for now I like to think that I will return sometime next year to tackle some more demons. For now I can function 'normally' again.

Thank you

I was at an all time low when I came to see you last year struggling with depression and anxiety and on anti-depressants. I had no self confidence, cried all the time and thought sooner or later those around me would abandon me because I was such a "burden". I actually thought I was losing my marbles. With your help and only a small number of sessions you opened my eyes to things in the past which were affecting my present. You made me realise Thom that my perception of myself was completely different than how others saw me and you gave me the strength to face some demons. Sometimes just saying things out loud to someone who is neither a friend or family member is all that is needed. I can't thank you enough and thank my lucky stars I had the sense to seek help when I needed it and also count my blessings that the person who I happened to come and see was you. You really have changed my life, I am no longer on anti-depressants and am now very happily married to the love of my life. I can never thank you enough Thom, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be the person I am today. Sincerely, heartfelt thanks.

Thank you for your help and support through a very difficult time. I don't think I would have been able to get through this as well without it.

I came to you with anxiety and depression. I had suffered with this for years and only ever really depended on medication which gave me limited help. You helped me through this maze and no it hasn't been easy but I am realising for the first time probably just who I am and that I am ok after all.

You made me feel welcome right from the start. Your office is warm and welcoming and you helped me feel relaxed straight away. Thank you for this as I may never have come back otherwise.

I have a new lease of life. Too much to put into something like this, but I will never forget how much you have helped me.

Thank you Tom

You'll know who

Thank you so much. Sometimes in life, we lose the ability to be able to see what's right before our eyes. You helped me see things clearer and this has affected so many parts of my life. I hear your voice in my head (not literally of course!) sometimes when I feel that I need support. My life is so different and my family and friends have noticed a difference too.

No words really other than thank you.

I was fairly desperate when I first came to see you. Unfortunately I was unable to make any sense of my thoughts or actions. Having considered our meetings, I don't think I could have chosen anybody better in my circumstances. You were professional at all times yet still remained friendly and likeable throughout, not something which many people would find easy in your position. You didn't judge me either.

In short, I just wanted to say thanks. I don't want to be so dramatic as to say you saved my life, but you have certainly had a profound effect on me and for that I will always be grateful.

I hope our paths cross again in the future!

anonymous

Sex is a tricky subject at the best of times and I was so nervous that I nearly bottled out. I'm glad I didn't.

Thank you for being so easy to talk to and for not judging me.

I can’t say I have found the experience enjoyable as I find it very difficult to talk about myself and open up. However, I feel the sessions have been very productive and helpful to me. I now have a better understanding of myself and can work on the aspects of my personality I would like to change.

321

I thought you would have a trick or something that would improve my life. It wasn't at all like I expected but then again, I got so much more from it than I ever could have imagined. It took me a while to 'get it' but when I did I learned so much about myself.

Thank you for illuminating my life.

I came to you for anger management issues and never realised that anger was healthy if I expressed it in a healthy way. Thank you for helping me with this. My life and my relationships are much improved because of it.

Take care!

I just thought I would give you some feedback on your new office. I was worried when you told me you were changing premises but your new office is just as warm and welcoming as your office from home and not at all 'formal'. And of course you're still the same warm, supportive, knowledgeable and professional person.

Yo Thom, you should know who this is ;) After mentioning you had a website before, I decided to google you - It worked!

Thanks for everything you're an absolute star, couldn't have done it without you, not a chance in hell!! I'll never forget your help!! CHEERS SPUD!!! :) x

I came to see you with anxiety but after talking to you, you helped me recognise I had guilt and also"people pleased" which was enough to give anyone anxiety. When we finished our sessions I felt confident and my self esteem had improved. I learn't that my past was where the problems began but that's all behind me and as they say I am moving on. I am calm, relaxed and I like myself alot more. Thank you Thom I feel without you I wouldn't be as happy as I am now.

I came to you with a range of issues related to childhood and also my adult relationships. You were professional and knowledgeable, giving me a good idea of the different types of therapy available to me and we adapted my therapy as and when I needed it.

Thank you for your skills and expertise but most of all thank you for your warm and genuine approach.

Rarely do you find someone who enjoys their work so much and it shows in your approach and knowledge.

Thank you.

I came to you regarding me and my partner's relationship problems. You recommended another therapist for my partner and you and I have worked together for the last 3 months.

I thought we had come to the end of our relationship but we have managed to work through our issues and I want to thank you for that.

I can recommend you to anyone if they have the commitment to want to change something about themselves or want to work on an aspect of their lives.

Have a lovely Christmas Thom!

Thank you for your understanding, empathy and help. I'm not sure where I would be now without it.

I initially resented having to pay someone to listen and understand me, let alone 'help' me. We worked through my resentment which can't have been easy, so thank you for sticking with me. Then we got the real work done and I allowed someone 'in' for the first time in many, many years.

My relationships have improved not only with others but also with myself.

I can't thank you enough.

It's hard to narrow down a lifetime's relationship problems into one 'issue'. I found through counselling that I can move beyond this and find a better way of being in the world. I have you to thank for this although I can't find any fancy words other than simply Thank You.

I came for an Initial Consultation and I just want to thank you for your honest and frank opinion. You didn't try and 'sell' yourself to me and what you advised was sensible and professional.

Anon

Thom helped me through the worst time of my life he taught me how to find myself and to deal with life and to find my own boundaries in a very comfortable and relaxed atmosphere, I would recommend Thom to everyone.

Thank you so much Thom

Anon

I'm not sure where I'd be now without your help. Thank you

My partner noticed changes in me first, then my friends then surprisingly me last. You noticed things about the way that I feel, think and behave that I had no idea about. It took me a while to engage with the process but you stuck with me when you didn't need to.

Thank you Thom

123

You were right. It isn't a 'quick fix' or a 'magic wand'. It was a difficult process but one that was worth it.

I was terrified when I first came to see you as I'd never asked anyone for help before. You quickly put me at ease and helped me to help myself. A skill I will never forget.

Thank you.

I'd been working with self-help books for years and spent a fortune thinking that therapy would cost me much more. If I add up what I spent on those books compared to the amount I've spent on therapy I would have saved money if I'd come to you earlier. Even if this wasn't the case, my therapy has been the best investment I've ever made in myself. It's made me more who I am than I've ever been (I know that makes sense to me!). Thank you Thom!

Online Therapy

I was very sceptical about online therapy but I couldn't find the right therapist near me and Thom was recommended to me, so I went for it. I've been in therapy with Thom for 5 months now and I can highly recommend him. He is very knowledgeable and professional and most of all he is very human. I really can't thank you enough Thom for being here for me at one of the most difficult times of my life. Your presence and skills have been so helpful to me.

Since going through therapy sessions with you, the things we spoke about are now (as you would say) filed under resolved. My life is most certainly going in a good direction. All is left for me to say now is simply, thank you. I can now look forward to my future with confidence rather than nervousness.

AMM

If someone had said to me a year and a half ago that I would end up in front of a counsellor, I would have told them they must be crazy… However, I ended up sitting in front of Thom in a moment of crisis and found myself on an insightful, thought provoking and invaluable journey! In a safe environment, Thom allowed me to explore who I am by raising my awareness of what goes on behind my ‘face of flippancy’. Through listening, reflecting and often humour, Thom helped me to understand who I am and supported me as I made some very difficult decisions in my life. So, a massive thank you Thom for being there for me through this process. Metaphoric slice of cheesecake attached for your enjoyment!!!

Anon

Over time Thom your acceptance has shown me that there is no shame in being exactly who I am in the world. I became brave enough to notice and name my emotions, sometimes even without judgement! I thought that I would get fixed somehow by talking with you but I now realise that I was never broken.

For me this has been an incredibly healing process. I feel more at peace with myself and able to fail sometimes without this being shattering. I remember once reading about therapists and clients and debates about 'therapeutic touch'. I realised that I have often felt more comfort from being heard, felt more safely held in our sessions, than I ever could be by a hug or a pat on the back.

Thank you Thom, you have been a huge part of my adventures and I will miss you.

My words can't do justice for what Thom has done for me. But if it persuades one person to give therapy a go, it'll be worth it.

I originally decided to make an appointment with Thom, due to the positive feedback from his previous clients. I approached the sessions with a healthy scepticism and found Thom to be professional, honest, warm, incredibly knowledgeable and passionate about his profession. One can see that he genuinely gets personal satisfaction from positive outcomes and it's more than 'just a job' to him.

I went to Thom with bereavement and long standing anxiety issues. I wasn't sure if he could help, but he exceeded my expectations. I went expecting to learn coping techniques, but came away with a deeper understanding of my problems and a new confidence in dealing with it. I really do feel like a new person. I thought I'd never be able to conquer my anxiety, granted, it's an ongoing process, but Thom has a fantastic manner that helped me to see things differently and he even explains the science behind it too!

Everything everyone else has said about Thom is true! I'd like to add something else too.

It's been a few years since I saw Thom for around a year, and I am a different person. I didn't think my thought patterns could change as they were so ingrained. I'd seen one or two other therapists briefly but nothing much came out of it, so I was sceptical about the whole therapy thing.

Therapy can be really hard work, and you've got to be very honest with yourself, which can make you cringe and feel disloyal and all sorts of other uncomfortable feelings. At times it feels like nothing much is coming from the therapy, and I sometimes questioned what I was getting out of it.

All I can say is, that if you aren't sure it's for you, or you're not sure whether it's doing the trick during the process, stick with it - it might be a while after finishing until you really see the differences but it's very much worth the effort.

Therapy changed my life - and that's down to Thom and the passion he puts into his work. Thank you!

Andreea

Brilliant therapist! It was a pleasure to work with Thomas Fairclough and I definetly recommend his services. In chosing my therapist the most important aspects were that the person sitting in front of me will not make me feel judged. I wanted to feel understood and interesting. For Thom that comes naturally! So, thank you, Thom!

P.S. I think I like the ideea of Aristotle's eudaimonia. I will try it for a while or maybe for a lifetime :).

Alex M

I really wanted to thank Thom for his hard work, and recommend him to anyone who is looking for a therapist/counsellor.

Thom is incredibly honest, patient and down to earth, which makes it incredibly easy to open up to him, convey feelings and talk about any sort of topic.

I saw Thom for a relatively short amount of time (9 sessions) due to relocating to a different part of the country, but in this short amount of time, the issues which I came to Thom with have all started to improve, and will hopefully continue to do so.

I don't see Thom just as a therapist, but more like a friend who I can talk about anything to, which I believe is a much better relationship to have with a therapist than just feeling like a patient.

I can't recommend Thom highly enough, and am very lucky to have

Anon

I can’t praise or recommend Thom enough. On a personal level he is a great person with a relaxing and interesting persona. On a professional level he is clearly very well researched in his field of expertise with a dept of knowledge which really helped me. When I first met Thom I had issues with general anxiety/health anxiety and often worried about ‘unrealistic’ things. Being a busy professional and having a young family this was a big risk to my career and family life (not good…). After trying medication which did very little for me I saw Thom’s website and decided to go and see him.

I was in quite a bad place when I first met him and after approximately 15 weekly sessions I have made a great ‘recovery’ and feel back to my old self again. Thom helped me to look at things from a different perspective and to anyone who doubts the power of therapy – try Thom !

Thanks again, and if I ever need any help in this area again you’ll be the first to know.

Thom,

Where to start? My experience of therapy with you was perfect timing in terms of my 'journey in life'. Your empathic, caring demeanour, your honesty and openness really helped me look at painful, raw stuff in a totally 'safe way'.

As you know, I'm also a therapist, and as such, have experienced 'good therapy' as well as 'not so good'. You are certainly in the 'superb camp' (undoubtedly!), and as such a fabulous professional role model.

Thank you for sharing my tears and laughter. X

Michael

I just wanted to say a huge thank you to Thom following my recent counselling sessions. I saw Thom around 5 years ago for a short period but needed to get further counselling mid way through 2013. I had no hesitation in finding Thom again. The last 6 months have been the toughest of my life for a variety of reasons and the way Thom has supported me can never be repaid. He listens, doesnt judge and, crucially, is honest enough to tell me the truth even if it is not always easy to hear. This honesty has been key in allowing me to address certain issues.

Thom instanty and without effort makes you feel relaxed and at ease. I can't recommend him highly enough.

Finally, Thom, thnak you so much for your time but particularly for seeing me at relativiely short notice last November. Words can't express how much that appintment in particular meant to me.

Many thanks and best wishes Thom.

Anon

Ok so i'm the one who never leads feedback but on this occasion i just have to make an exception!

Thank you Thom for your unbelievable patience and understanding. I have given you so much grief over the past few months yet you have stuck by me giving me endless support and guidance throughout. You have answered every single text message and email I sent you and frequently managed to fit me in for extra sessions whenever i needed them.

I am amazed at the topics of conversation between us, things i never imagined talking about especially with a man!

Admittedly i'm not where i need to be just yet but therapy for me has been quite intense and i'm grateful you respect and understand my need to take a break, at least for a while. I honestly have no idea right now whether I will be able to return to face up to my inner torment but one thing for sure, should this be possible, there is nowhere else i would rather be.

Thank you so so much for my last amazing session which made me feel so good when you left me with no doubt that your door would always be open and that you would be there for me should i find the strength to continue.

In conclusion, you've taught me that i don't need to cope with life's difficulties and challenges alone and i can only re-iterate what others have said before me.

Until we 'hopefully' meet again, take care of my chair ........................C No 5 (female)

ABC

I just wanted to say that as much as I've felt 'alone' and a little lost, in my own unique way, now that I've stopped my sessions, I also feel confident that I'm on the right path and I have to say that without your help over the last 18 months I would I wouldn't be where I am now. You've been an enormous support, a never judging ear and just what I needed all those months ago when I first approached you. So thank you for providing me with the opportunity to let out all the stuff I've been carrying round - and I applaud you for not yawning once!! Take care Thom and thank you!

Firstly, I want to say that Thom is a counsellor who great for putting you at ease and helps you to open up about your issues in life. When I first began, I was nervous, reserved and afraid but Thom helped me bring myself out of my shell with his non-judgmental, sensitive and attentive approach to therapy. He is able to switch your mentality and divert your attentions away from focusing on the possibilities and reverting to practiality. He is helpful particularly in viewing situations from a range of angles and gently challenging and encouraging you to challenge your own assumptions about what ever situation you bring to counselling. I have always found Thom to be extremely professional and open with me on anything I have discussed with him. He is very attentive to information that you provide and has often recalled many key pieces of information from past session to influence present ones. I am very glad that I have met Thom and have undertaken his help in rediscovering myself and building my own sense of belief, confidence and resolve.

Thank you so so so so much!

From the day we met you provided me with support and helped me find insight into my feelings, thoughts, behaviour, my life. Not many people come into a life and have such a profound effect and I'm not sure whether it was just good luck that I chose to contact you or whether fate had some part to play but no matter as I got above and beyond what I anticipated. Thank you.

Sheila

I want to record my grateful thanks to you, Thom, for all you have encouraged me to achieve over the past year. You helped to restore my self confidence and a belief in myself in such a kind and caring way. Your support gave me the tools to put the past behind me, to live in 'the now' and to be hopeful for the future - I will be eternally grateful that a simple Google search led me to your door. Serendipity?

You are a very special person - patient, non-judgmental, knowledgeable and utterly professional. I immediately felt comfortable in your warm and inviting office, and, even when the conversation was painful, always felt the warmth of your empathy and understanding. What a memory too! - although you must have many clients, you always remember what we have discussed previously - a real gift.

I will miss our meetings but am optimistically looking forward to a new and happier 'phase four' of my life. Heartfelt thanks for showing me the way.

Anita

Thom is a great person to go on a voyage of self-discovery with. His incredible insight and intuition really takes you to where you need to be, but never in a forceful way, always at your own pace with lots of support and encouragement and totally without any judgment. He is very easy to talk to and I always felt confident that there was 100% confidentiality, so I could be open, honest and frank. We covered a whole range of issues that I had been through and surprisingly it wasn't always the major traumas that were the problem. Some of the revelations throughout the journey were quite painful, but they were necessary and acted as a 'release'. So, 'thank you' Thom for guiding me through the experience and enabling me to really 'see'.

Thankyou! I had a serious dilemma and didn't know which way to turn. Advice from friends and family was fast and furious but didn't help however well intentioned. I needed someone impartial who could help me find my own answers of which I did so thank you Thom.

It's been some time since I came to you for counselling but I wanted to take the time to reflect on the whole process before putting something on your feedback page.

My 'journey' took about a year in all and in all honesty it came with its ups AND downs. I don't think I 'got' it at first and expected to come to a few sessions and you wave a magic wand for me and off I would go. It took hard work and commitment to get through it. It also took courage in the sense that I have learned to be more honest with myself (if not necessarily with others) and had to face things about myself that I didn't particularly like.

You helped me with genuine caring and with real (sometimes gentle sometimes less so!) challenge but we always managed to work through these things and this is down to your skill, honesty and sensitivity.

Thank you doesn't seem enough to convey what I feel right now. But alas this is all a feedback page will allow so thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Thom manages to balance professionalism with a genuinely caring attitude, He puts you at ease as soon as meeting you. I was TERRIFIED walking up to the door and as soon as we met I felt immediately reassured and comfortable in his company. I suffered childhood abuse for many years and I thought it may be difficult talking to a man about it but Thom had been highly recommended so I went along and took a chance. I'm so glad that I did. He has skills beyond pieces of paper to prove it (although he obviously has them as well!) and things came out of my counselling that I never thought would or could. There isn't enough space here to reflect what an impact this has had on my life but I would like to say thank you again - I will never forget you.

It's hard to believe that I've come as far as this. Only a few months ago I imagined my life was over and I came to you the most desperate I've ever been in my life. You didn't judge me or make me false promises or sit nodding your head in a patronising way. I could sense that you were genuine right at the outset and we have both worked hard. Thank you for your time and experience and most of all for being just you.

Contact me:

07892 724023

info@thomfairclough.co.uk

2026